User blog comment:Palantian/Fate/Oblivion Twilight/@comment-3343773-20150208042115/@comment-2181954-20150208071922

And then comparing it to this:

Hawkeye2701's Draft

Name: Zulkan Makiri

Age: 197

Gender: Male

Character Type: Human, Magus, Master

Height: 176 cm

Weight: 68 kg

Hair colour: Grey

Eye Colour: Red

Talents: Manipulation and Charisma

Appearance: Unlike his father, whose body has noticably deteriorated over the centuries he has been alive, Zulkan took a different approach, and as such retains his original form, the only signs of his body's unnatural longevity being his grey aged hair and inhuman red eyes.

Personality: Zulkan is every bit the man Shinji Matou wishes to be. Charismatic and manipulative, he possesses unnatural power for a magus and is not afraid to flaunt it. He detests the current state of his bloodline, considering his father Zouken's method of rebirth and the thinning of their blood to be proof of the once noble lineage withering on the vine.

History: Once heir apparent to the Makiri lineage, Zulkan was chosen as the champion to enter the Second Holy Grail War. Allying himself with the Einzbern master of the day, the quickly eradicated the competition, but upon realising that the grail could not materialise the root without the sacrifice of all servants, he turned on his ally and in their conflict nearly killed each other outright. Unable to utilize the grail, the ritual ended in failure.

Half-dead, Zulkan barely made it back to his father, only for the aged head of the clan to declare him a failure, and state that all participants of the Second War had died. Understanding his father's meaning, Zulkan left the country, discarding his family name along the way.

After nearly 200 years of wandering, Zulkan has obtained a new goal. To obtain power and understanding without the need of Akasha and has started killing other magus in order to merge their magic crests with his own, and become a creature capable of performing true, miraculous magic.

Ability: Zulkan possesses the Matou Crest Worms inside his body, but has long since cured the deterioration caused by these parasitic creatures. Having studied and applied his knowledge of necromancy to his own body, Zulkan routinely enters a form of spiritual statis in which the worms within him grow dormant and allow him to regenerate the damage they have done.

During his time working alongside the Einzbern, he has also picked up some basic alchemy, but is unable to apply it, instead using it more as a guideline to understand Alchemists he comes across in battle.

With his decision to hunt down magus and steal their magic crests, he has discovered the means to merge the crests, which are of course incompatible with his own body, into his crest worms, giving him an arsenal of spells that can be unleashed by invoking specific members of his infectious brood.



<p style="margin-bottom:0cm;">And that's Zulkan, I had to tweak it in many ways, using his being disowned to explain the lack of survivors from the second war and such. I reduced his age considerably, while I realise Zouken is like 500 years old, it's not necessary that Zulkan be anywhere near that and I think it helps his origin if he is considerably younger. I removed his summoning ability, mainly because without a system like the Holy Grail, it's an insanely inpractical skill to be summoning False Gods, and the materialsation of even something as low level as Fairies prove pretty much impossible for most magus. I decided to have fun with his other specialities though, make him this almost Orochimaru like character who absorbs others powers to explain his abilities in Rune Magic, Elemental Crafts and some Alchemy. Anyway, now onto the Servant.